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TOO HARD’S YAS QUAIN: The Full Movie

BY POPULAR DEMAND: Danyale Patterson’s 2017/18 Masterpiece “Yas Quain” has dropped in its entirety and HERE. IT. IS. If the Catfish  wasn’t busy stuffing his face, and still worked here, it would have been posted days ago. But he doesn’t, and our posting kitty had a lot of karaoke to sing last night, so 3,612 of you have already seen this (not to mention: everyone in RENO.)  For the rest of you baaaaaaaaaaad bitches, Danyale is an artist and you will LOVE it. 

Hot Box: Bitches Deserve Respect!

Ed: The following words for our new voice-of-the-people section “Hot Box” were written by Charlotte Scott. If women with opinions make you angry, we recommend reading it. Twice. All non-screen grabbed photos courtesy of Tim Zimmerman/Gnu Snowboards.


The baddest bitch in the game, Dangy Patterson. earning it the hard way.

A couple of weeks ago, my timeline was full of fed up women posting #metoo. Being an affected female, I joined in. It’s no secret that women are just OVER IT. Over the bullshit and everything else that keeps us from just living our lives without microaggressions, or some dude’s bad attitude because you’d rather not suck their small dick. The snowsports world is no exception to this bullshit, so here are my 97 theses nailed to snowboarding’s door.

I got into the snowsports world because my dad was a PSIA/AASI certified instructor at Alpine Valley, so I grew up in the ski school. (And yes, rode on the same slopes as Danny Davis at the same time. #humblebrag) I switched from two planks to one when I was 8 and loved it. My dad tried to make me do both, but that was a losing battle. It wasn’t immediate that I noticed the rift between boys and girls snowboarding; I was just so stoked to be on a board and loving it. But as I got older, I realized that girls and women had to work 3x as hard to get any type of props on a board.

I was surrounded by dudes but none of them ever respected what I brought to the table.

I’ve always been kind of a wuss in the park. The idea of smashing all my teeth out on a box or rail or the idea of being both cold AND in pain never completely jived with me. I found my groove in carving — way before the Yawgoons made it cool, and thank JAH they did, because now I can be cool, too! — and more technical aspects of snowboarding, but most of all, teaching this to other people. Unfortunately because landfill hills of the Midwest are limited in terrain, the park is where you earned your stripes, 

so I pushed my boundaries for the sake of earning male respect (ugh). 

This was nearly impossible. Every time I did something I was super proud of, it still didn’t make me good enough. I spent most of my adolescence trying to be as good as, or better than, the boys. When I moved to Vermont, I finally was better than the boys, but I realized I actually loved being better for ME. Being better than dudes was just a cherry on top.

 

It was around this time I also realized, the snowboarding industry didn’t have my back. Whether is was making shitty products or just not bothering to represent me as a demographic, it became apparent I loved actual snowboarding, but marketable snowboarding didn’t give a fuck about me.

One time I tried on a pair of women’s jeans from a snowboard brand that was the same waist size as the brand’s men’s jeans that fit me, and I couldn’t get the leg of it past mid thigh. Why does a sporting goods company think that women who buy their products don’t have thigh muscles?

My thighs are my most sacred thing about snowboarding. They allow me to, I don’t know, do shit.

One season, I bought $300 boots that only lasted me 40 days in the season before the lining blew out in the heel. They hadn’t even broken in yet around my toes, which were still going numb by the end of every day. When I went in-store to exchange them with my warranty, I was told that as an instructor I needed to be in a “higher end” boot to accommodate all the walking I did every season. What’s more higher end than $300? And how can I afford that on an instructor salary?

Do men who hike features in the park, backcountry or urban all day have to spend more than $300 to make a boot last a whole season?

Then you have dumpster-fire media companies, such as Unofficial Networks, which are still pandering to the circle-jerking Chads of the world who think hyper-sexualized women is good marketing. And when confronted with several women who inform them of how outdated and lazy this marketing ploy is, they sarcastically respond “we took it down since you were so utterly offended.” It’s not about the offense, brother, it’s about the fact that it somehow got okay’d (probably by several males) before it was word-vomited onto their facebook page.

If you don’t see what’s wrong with this, you really can’t be helped.

Or how about on Social Media, where a Volcom-sponsored post, which showed up on my newsfeed just today that boasted an article about “rad Florida babes” who, I think… skateboard? But Volcom wanted you to believe they sat on skateboards and loitered. I asked the company to consider the following: would you have described the same group of skaters as “rad babes” if they were all men? Would you also have used a picture of men standing around? Or would they be in action? Diving deeper into their facebook and Instagram, I came to the conclusion that Volcom didn’t take us seriously as athletes. Mentions of women on their facebook were mainly fashion-focused. Now don’t get me wrong, I love some style inspiration as much as the next person. My continued issue and frustration is that I had no problem at all finding plenty of articles, photos and videos of men in action, doing stuff, while the female-centric posts were lame in comparison. What’s the deal? Does Volcom not have great female athletes they like to show off? Their instagram was the same: plenty of men in action, almost dominantly so, a few women in action, and a handful of bikini shots.

This lazy, sexist, and microaggression-ridden marketing leaks into the bigger picture of how women are viewed and treated as athletes, equals, and professionals. Seven Days reported in an article last year, “…male snowboarding participants in all age groups declined from 5.4 million riders in the 2010-11 winter season to 4.7 million in 2014-15. During that same period, the number of female snowboarding participants rose from 2.7 million to 2.9 million. In the last season alone, [Kelly] Davis notes, women’s involvement in the sport jumped 10 percent over the previous season.” So while we’re seeing snowboarding as a whole decline, women’s snowboarding is increasing. Why are snowboarding marketing teams panicking about how to bring people in, when the answer has been in front of them the whole time? Women.

And not women looking like they’ve been photoshopped into nature, but women with dirt under their nails and on their faces. Women with sweat and unkempt hair and looks of determination. GNU is also dialing into the equality of men and women in snowboarding. I frequently see women in action, and women’s content on their social media. Their boards are consistently diverse and give plenty of options for the full spectrum of female taste. I assume this is in great part due to Barrett Christy, who oversees the women’s board graphics. RIDE is also, secretly on point with their female graphics. I never see a lot of talk about RIDE boards, but if you’re fed up with shrinky dink pink boards, I encourage you to check them out.

 

Last winter, I donated my time to Mt Brighton Ski School in exchange for a free day-pass. I enjoy peer-to-peer exchanges of information and thought a clinic on carving and reverse carves would be a fun time. My dad being the proud papa bear he is bragged and advertised for weeks leading up to my visit, hoping to garner some excitement about coming. One person he introduced me to prior to this stood out to me. He was friendly enough during introductions, the moment my dad told him I was running a clinic and that he should attend, his entire demeanor changed. You know that look men get when they immediately are discrediting your experience and knowledge? Yeah. That’s the look he shot my way and his tone of voice made it easy to read between the lines.

“Oh… are you certified or something?”

“Yeah! I’m a level II staff trainer from Vermont.”

“Yeahhhhhh…. I’m from Colorado originally, riding out there is pretty tough”

“That’s weird, I’ve been under the impression that the East Coast is the most competitive and hardest to certify in because of unforgiving conditions, steep and narrow terrain, and bitter cold. Are you certified?”

“Nah”

Oh. Ok.

BTW he did not attend my clinic that night.

Earning turns is the oldest cliche in the book, but to say Barrett Christy earned this epic slash at Baldface lodge would be an understatement anyway.

I once taught a clinic right before I got my Level II at Alpine Valley, MI. Again, another favor and donation of my time in exchange for a free pass (BIG UPS TO ALPINE VALLEY 4EVER, MUCH LOVE.) The ski school director, while notoriously a hard ass, believed and respected my ethic, hard work and expertise enough to take all his snowboarders out in a mandatory training. It was 100% dudes. The focus being on ankle flexion and extension (my all-time fave thing to talk about). I had one guy in particular spend the entire 3 hours talking NONSTOP and humble bragging about the 1 time he went to Alaska (so cool bro), and how good he was. He didn’t pay attention once during my whole clinic. So at the end, I taught a cab three nose-roll with the ankle flexion as the main character to really tie it all together. I was met with instant respect from all dudes [who thought I was all talk and boring fundamentals] except Mr. I-Snowboarded-Alaska-Once. His only response? “I can’t do that with this board, it’s too stiff.” Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight.

Bet Kaitlyn Farrington could do this on any board she wanted to. 

One time while teaching at Sugarbush I overheard a guy and his girlfriend talking to the desk ladies.

Her: “I want to take a snowboard lesson”

Him: “Snowboarding is too hard for girls to learn” Lol.

Another time teaching at Sugarbush I had a woman and her boyfriend’s sister in a lesson. We had to come inside to fix her stance because it wasn’t working out for her. Her boyfriend came over to see what was up. He asked where we were practicing and I pointed towards the magic carpet where all beginner lessons live. He replied, “Aw, that’s so cute!” Right. Cute. For imagery purposes, he swaggered up with his brand new Burton Love board with those terrible, distasteful graphics of soulless-looking porn stars with shitty Chris Nunez tattoo flash over the lady bits. Such a classy man.

I help run a social media page called Ride Like Her. It’s more of a hobby and desire to pat all my fellow ladies on the back for doing what they do and giving other women something to aspire to. Whether you’re snowboarding for the first time, still a beginner, or crushing the backcountry, I wanted a place to celebrate women because for some reason, society still really dislikes us. I posted a Too Hard edit to the Facepage and received a comment quickly from a male AASI instructor coming down super critical on the skateboard footy they featured. I’ll say that every trick they do in every edit is above my skill level and I bow down to them for that. He seemed to miss the point of the post, and the whole page tbh. See below:

“This chick needs to step up her skate game. How did those clips make edit?

“Not trying to be mean, but if I saw a dude throwing wack ass kickflips and p rail board slides to regs for an edit I’d call him out too. No double standards.

“I’m all about doing what you do because it’s fun. There are plenty of people out there pushing wood in all kinds of ways, and I’m all about empowerment on a board, but being female is not some sort of impediment to the sport, I don’t want it treated as such.

“I’m not sipping any hateorade. Being critical isn’t being hateful. I’m not telling her to go big or go home, or hang up her board. I’m saying I think she can do better.”

And then he mansplained me, I won’t bore you with his mansplaining because it doesn’t matter. The point? Women are always held to higher standard and under constant scrutiny no matter what they do.

Dangy does it her way. 

So what can we do?

We can start by throwing away our hate. Maybe you caught the recent Yobeat Article about the perpetuation of shade-throwing and bad vibes in the industry. That’s a big contributing factor to women feeling like they don’t have a place in snowboarding, even though we bust our asses for it. We can start questioning snowboard companies that continue to insist we like pink and fur on everything. (For the record, there’s nothing wrong with pink and liking pink, but we’re sick of that being our only option.) We can start pushing back on social media when we see over and over women in inaction. We can start our own companies, such as Coalition Snow, that make products for women, by women. We can start getting stoked about anyone doing something cool or nailing something for the first time — whether this is their first double cork or their first time in the park or even their first turn. It doesn’t matter as long as we’re stoked about it. We can check ourselves, myself included, before being an asshole. Ask yourself, is this necessary energy I’m spending on throwing shade at someone else, or is this energy better spent on snowboarding and minding my own business? 

Women are waking up, my friends, and we’re sick of being told and shown we’re not equal. Bitches deserve respect and we’re not settling for anything less.


Ageless, sexless and just. plain. rad. Barrett Christy


If you made it all the way here and you have you your own opinion you’d like to share, send us your words for a future Hot Box to submissions at yobeat dot com.

A Quickie with Madison Blackley and Taylor Elliot

The latest installment from Jess Kimura’s The Uninvited features Taylor and Kendall Elliot and Madison Blackley. These babes have shared a lot more than a part over the years – beds, cars, winches, sushi, tears, laughs, and maybe more… but all sexual innuendos aside, instead of us asking them the same old bullshit questions, we decided to have Madison do it for us.

Madison: How old are you and where have you spent the last few years snowboarding and filming?

Taylor: I’m 23 and I’ve been based out of Truckee, California for the last 4 years

A post shared by @yung_taytay on


Tell us about when you first moved out of your parents house and decided to spend the summer in hood?

Haha. Somehow you convinced my sisters and I it’d be a good idea to move to Hood for the summer when we were 17 with no money. It was a hell of a time, I honestly don’t think I snowboarded more than 6 days all summer. We lived off of free kashi cereal from Amy Mayernick and eventually Kevin at the Taco Shoppe gave us a job. It came to an end with the three of us in the back of a cop car together on our way to juvie because we tried to sneak into Matty MO’s dance party at the Rat through the cafe upstairs.

You guys were pretty easily persuaded. Who is supporting you and your snowboarding endeavors currently? People? Companies?

Right now my biggest supporters are my family, Brandon, Jess, and all my friends! This upcoming winter I’ll be teaming up with Nikita, Deeluxe, and cruising a Capita board!

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Best and worst moment of filming the past couple years?

Best moment is hard to say, I had a lot of fun last year. Japan was sick and Tahoe was a dream with all the snow we got. Worst moment… shit who knows, I’m sure there were a few can’t remember though.

What can we expect from you in the future, any plans or projects?

I plan on filming for the Uninvited movie, and riding pow with the powanoia babes. Let the good times roll!

Too Hard: Yas Quain Teaser

In light of the currently #metoo discussion we bring you the latest teaser from Too Hard.

Featuring: A bunch of bad bitches who are gonna do what they want, despite the fact they don’t get paid, get told they suck over and over on the Internet, and cool guy’d out of spots and are referred to in high level snowboarding marketing meetings as “unmarketable” over and over and over.

Yas Bitch – these chicks fucking rip. 

Subscribe and follow along all season on the Too Hard Youtube. 

Too Hard: Un Bel Fionna 2017

Despite a complete lack of support from the corpo-minded snowboard industry, the Too Hard movement has spread across the globe. Dangy and her crew of jib girls are doing their thing all across the glaciers of Europe and here’s one from Fonna.

Marjorie Couturier 2016

Full part from Marjorie’s Too Hard clips from 2016.

Danyale Patterson 2015/16 Sponsor Me Video

A season mash-up from her 2015/16 season/ Too Hard section, to be distributed on VHS cassette to potential sponsors.

Too Hard: Whistler Spring 2016

Riders: Danyale Patterson, Alexa Welgan, Marjorie Couturier, Darrah Reid-McLean, Maria Thomsen, Joanie Robichaud

Too Hard – BANG 5 Teaser

Riders:
Darrah Reid-McLean
Marjorie Couturier
Fancy Rutherford
Danyale Patterson
Maria Bertram Thomsen
Madison Blackley
Maria Hilde
Christine Savage
Laura Rogoski
Corinne Pasela

Filmers:
Kai Ujejski
Seb Judge
Colter Heard
Keith Rutherford
and more

Too Hard: We on. Winter 2016 <3

Boarding 4 the $ in BC, Lake Tahoe, Salt Lake City, Copper Mt by:

Danyale Patterson
Morgan Lynne
Fancy Rutherford
Christine Savage
Madison Blackley
Maria Thomsen
Darrah Reid mc LEAN

 

Too Hard: Fancy Rutherford Re-Edit

The most prim and proper lass of Too Hard, here’s a remix of Fancy’s clips from last season.

Maria Hilde’s Romantic 2014/15 Season

Hopelessly romantic.

A Too Hard Twofer

The best kind of sloppy seconds.

Too Hard – It’s Lit FULL MOVIE

Despite your votes for the name “Tuff Muffs” the ladies of Too Hard present their 4th effort: It’s Lit!

Riders

Danyale Patterson
Corinne Pasela
Madison Blackley
Fancy Rutherford
Morgan Lynne Anderson
Maria Thomsen
Dina Treland
Maria Hilde
Mary Luggen
Desronique “Vero” Verosiers
Marjorie Couturier
Joanie Robichaud
Kayli Hendricks
Jill Perkins

 

Too Hard at Camp of Champs

The Too Hard girls just fucked your bitch.

jibgurls:
Darrah reid – mclean
Danyale Patterson
Corinne Pasela
Maria Thomsen

Filmers:
Seb Judge
Jordan Macdonald
Mat Wilkinson