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30s Thursday: Preston’s Poems™

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5 Geographic Limericks

Your normal 30’s Thursday programming has been temporarily* replaced with Preston’s Poemsâ„¢.   I have decided to dabble in Action Sport’s Poetry!  An extreme (-ly lame), cutting edge form of snowboard journalism/entertainment.

The following are five limericks inspired by The Man From Nantucket.

Bear.

There once was this man from Big Bear.
He had a perfect deep tan and nice hair.
To impress all the foxes,
He’d nose press their boxes.
And they’d lip slide his rail to be fair.

Salt Lake.

There once was a man from Salt Lake.
Who liked powder and handrails and steak.
He cooked on a George Forman,
and was totally Mormon.
And when he talked about both he would shake.

Vermont.

If you ever meet a man from Vermont.
Know that a nice halfpipe is all that he’d want.
But, if he’s in need of a cheer up,
Give him pure maple syrup –
or a plane ticket to go on a jaunt.

Seattle.

There once was a man from Seattle.
The Banked Slalom was his ultimate battle.
If there’s one thing he feared,
it was not having a beard.
So his face looked like the backside of some cattle.

Midwest.

There once was kid from the Midwest,
and he knew that he could soon be the best.
So he rode tons of park,
on small hills in the dark.
Then he moved, and we all know the rest…

*until further notice.