Americans love their freedom. Freedom to pay for everything they need! Freedom to sue if they don’t get what they want! Freedom, baby, it’s great.

Meanwhile, just a bit to our north, our Canadians are just begging to get in. They’re tired of sharing everything with each other (even snowboard parts!) They’re tired of being charged with mischeif instead of REAL crimes. They’re sick of all that damn cold and snow facring them to snowboard all winter long! They just wanna listen to some smooth jazz, cruise around on their blades, and get any color Adidas onesie they want without paying crazy import tarriffs! Is that really so much to ask??!

It may be true that several of the previous statements are alternative facts. But it’s all up for debate, and just like Will and Dominic (who will always get special treatment here at the ‘beat because of THIS) we’d like your input. We know logging in to comment is different, scary and hard, but we assure you, it’ll all be worth it when you press send on that super witty comment. We love you and we miss you, too.

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