The Hood Report: 2017

Yeah, that’s a hybrid #portlandmeritbadge

Good news kids! It’s like we’ve hopped in a time machine and headed straight back to the early ’00s when Mother Nature used to provide enough of that good stuff to go around all year long at Mt. Hood! Despite reports of dire glacial conditions at Whistler shuttering Camp of Champs, Timberline is looking prime this year with snow piles as far down as Gov’y. As of June 25th you can still do full laps on the Magic Mile lift, and there is a 22′ pipe and a mile-long park to boot! My predictions are for full laps until at least July 4th or so.

The scene is the same — gypsters, ski racers, dirt bags and little kids who are better than you. The pro count was low on my visit, but let’s be real, does anyone even care about pros anymore? And they’re bound to show up sooner or later, so don’t fret.

Cobra Dogs, Volcano Cones, Charlie’s, the Taco Shoppe and all your other usual food options still apply. Sadly no, there is not a dispensary in Gov’y yet, but there are two in nearby Welches — a great excuse to go poach the Windells skatepark. Apparently High Cascade is still in business as well.

That about sums it up. Weatherman says it’s supposed to be a hot summer though, so get your ass up here sooner rather than later.

45 replies
  1. Irrelevant like star wars battlefront 1
    Irrelevant like star wars battlefront 1 says:

    Meta skateboarding already used Jake OE’s song in Mayday. G’all. Jus sayin.

  2. Also
    Also says:

    Do you think rav’s parents are disappointed in him? Like, they just look at him and say maaaaaan, you used to be so on point… Sigh.. Guess I’ll just go blackout at the local bah and FUGHEDABOUDIT

  3. Bristles the cactus
    Bristles the cactus says:

    It’s not just any dinos board. It’s bogarts ladies good wood winner. Way to innovate Brooke. Coupled with 12 whole seconds of riding, you really took the viewer there.

  4. SPROTZ TALK
    SPROTZ TALK says:

    Well since this place is dead let’s liven it up with a little sprotz talk. I dunno about y’all but personally I’m getting on the fuck golden State bandwagon. The Cavs need to add melo and beat that golden State ass for 2 years before free agency hits and the entire basketball community relocates to LA because why the fuck not.

  5. Troll
    Troll says:

    Some troll wastes time out of his day everytime you post something. Keep it up Brooke, you are obviously doing it right

  6. I may be a kook but at least I'm not ugly
    I may be a kook but at least I'm not ugly says:

    And I’m not the troll who gets off at 420am.. could the troll be Australian?? Yobeat knows. Yobeat always knows..

  7. Cappitano
    Cappitano says:

    Can you please find a way to track and block the IP address of the guy who spams the comment boards on every post so that the yobeat website doesn’t completely die? It’s absolutely unreal how many people stopped coming to this site to actively engage in the comment board because their is some crazy person posting fragmented in all caps. You have more than enough reason to and it’s legitimately the only way that you’re going to be able to save this site.

    • Cappitano
      Cappitano says:

      Can you please find a way to track and block the IP address of the guy who spams the comment boards on every post so that the yobeat website doesn’t completely die? It’s absolutely unreal how many people stopped coming to this site to actively engage in the comment board because their is some crazy person posting fragmented thoughts* in all caps. You have more than enough reason to and it’s legitimately the only way that you’re going to be able to save this site.

      • GEORGE
        GEORGE says:

        IAM pretty sure Trump is the dude blowing it up in ALL CAPS . he caused global warming 2——that’s why we got no snow at HOOD DIS YEARG

  8. Excess
    Excess says:

    Why do the people need yobeat in the summer? Well, high cascade still exists, not to mention various other glaciers/summer parks. Plus what happened to the new Zealand coverage? I get perisher is hip af but those new Zealand guys actually seemed friendly. #makesnowboardingfunagain
    #weneedphilcollins
    #andicanfeelitcomingintheairtonightohlawd
    #ordowe
    #no
    #nowedont
    #weneedthehiphopthatsplayinginskateshops
    #totheskateshop
    #killtheowner
    #whoa
    #toofar

  9. Plank from ed edd & eddy
    Plank from ed edd & eddy says:

    Can’t top skating sketch factor when it comes to bombing hills. It’s just full commit. Pick your line. And pray. Snowboarders are a bunch of strapped in, masochistic, pussies.

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