Toeside Terrors Start a Band


After the Toeside Terror's brush with a lazer-boob induced death at the U.S. Open. The team looked for a better opportunity to get to Hansu Weith, and his new douchey haircut.


I don't know if getting him during a contest is really our bag, you know? and like what are we even gonna do when we actually get him. Kill him?

God no... said Terry. I hadn't really thought that far. I just thought we would sort of.... publicly shame him and then reside supreme over him?

Makes sense to me. Said Mr A.



This does mean bad things... for us. For the World!


The name of the band is bad things.



Guys look at this flyer. It's a battle of the bands against Bad Things. We just gotta start a band and then publicly humiliate them.

And so it was. The gang got together to form a band of superheroes.

They practiced their song,

Metal, Not Medals...

a master piece crafted to slap Hansu with satire.

But Hansu was on to the Toeside Terrors. There was no battle of the bands at all. It was a trap.

When The Toeside Terrors arrived and set up, a cage dropped over them.


Hansu Ran Out and in his measely voice said:

Finally I can put an end to you miserable pipsqueaks, This cage is solid, gold, MADE FROM MY MEDALS!

How would the Toeside Terrors Escape? There was only one way. TO ROCK!


The Toeside terrors rocked so hard that the metal around the cage split in half in a side affect of the songs awesomeness.


Your Metal just tore through my Medals!!

Hansu whistled and jumped onto a ginger dinosaur and flew away.



And It would seem Hansu had slipped through their fingers again. But there is hope dear reader, for in the next episode, the Toeside Terrors plan an Olympic takeover with help from Seth Wescott's soul patch, and other Olympians.

6 replies
  1. TRUTH
    TRUTH says:

    TBH Shaun White’s band is pretty good, saw them live at Lollapalooza after Death Grips cancelled and I gained a lot of respect for him because for the first time ever he didn’t look like a complete douche.

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