Mike Baker gets a pep talk from Andrew Mutty. It’s explained if he speed checks, falls or I beat his time, he’s a pussy. Photos: Jared Souney
It’s the third weekend of March, 2013 and you know what that means. Yep. Everyone’s completely over the fact the US Open moved to Vail. In fact, the resilient and resourceful members of the East Coast snowboard community have been busy so planning their own events, they clearly forgot to talk to each other about it, and and the result is more god damn events than one weekend can handle — none of which feature bag checks.
People keep saying “no one cares about the East Coast,” but hot damn almost 90 people showed up for this nonsense.
The festivities kicked off at Ragged Mountain in New Hampshire with the 1st Annual Mike Baker Banked Slalom, where the dirtiest of New Hampshire dirts congregated to give each other a ton of shit and race down the hill. It’s been established at this point that Banked Slaloms are the new rail jam — the go-to event if you wanna get people together and have a good time, and with a name like Mike Baker leading the charge, this was a no brainer.
Jared got all sort of artsy on the photos, and if I wasn’t a jerk, I would probably know who this is.
As with any good ol’ New Hampsha event, the gauntlet was where the real fun went down. On the most technical turn of the course, a right hand berm that shot you up hill to a tight left one, competitors gathered one by one after finishing their final run to heckle, pelt the passing riders with ice chunks and beer cans, and generally cause a scene. Only one person seemed upset (and rightly so, the newly placed ice boulders did cause him to crash dramatically into the fence) but the unsympathetic NHD’s just shrugged it off. “That’s why you take your runs early, guy.”
Beware the gauntlet. the NHD’s (and Josh who is actually from VT) give no fucks.
Even though the final results seemed the least of most people’s concern, there were goods up for grabs. $500 for first place overall, a Gucci bag from Concepts for the ladies, and free pig roast for the top 20 fastest times. There was also free PBR in the bar upstairs for everyone, so that’s cool.
This is Chris Carr. He definitely went the fastest (that’s not just camera tricks) and even scored some cash money for his efforts.
Due to some kinks in the timing system, the run times ended up being combined, instead of the best of format that was promised. After some feigned outrage, everyone pretty much realized it didn’t matter and in the end, Chris Carr won the Open Division, Aaron Diamond topped 30+ and Taylor Owen won for chicks. Most importantly, Michael Mazzella got dead last, which means he gets a NHD tattoo. It’s possible he will have to give it to himself.