How to Get Free Drinks at a Snowboard Premiere

Not only will we take Nike’s money for ads, we’ll also let them buy us drinks (two at a time, at that.) Brooke Geery with Nike’s Bobby Meeks and Scott Keating.

Premiere season is a rough one on the wallet. Going out for drinks before the screening, drinking at the screening, and then heading to a bar for drinks after the screening tends to add up quicker than one realizes, and typically results in one intentionally avoiding the ATM for fear of actually seeing how much they spent the night before. Then multiply this nightly pattern by the average number of snowboard premieres in a given city. The amount spent on booze can be astronomical. So how can an unpaid Intern support a hearty lineup of snowboard rages, you ask? To answer that question, I’ve put together a simple guide to drinking for free at snowboard events.

A crowd of people that likes to drink, and knows where to get ’em! Phil Jaques, Pat McCarthy, Mike Rav, Cale Zima and Andrew Burns.

Step 1: Find the crowd.

This step should make perfect sense – Look for big groups of people swarming around a certain spot at the bar. No one really likes being squished into a small area, so if they are, there’s usually good reason for it. That reason is almost always copious amounts of free booze being bought on a corporate credit card. These crowds of people are smarter than you, and have already found the jackpot. Follow suit and join the swarm.

See those glasses? No doubt when they’re getting empty! Austin LeMoine, Blue Montgomery, Jess Kimura and another dude we should probably know.

Step 2: Have the right glass.

This is a pretty easy one to accomplish. Drink out of some sort of clear glass. Drinking out of a clear glass allows the corporate card carrying individual to see inside your glass, and ultimately notice how little drink you have left before you need another. Which brings me to the next step….

If it’s your turn to sing when the drinks are being bought, you might have to miss a round. Mike Rav, Russell Winfield, Cale Zima and Sean Tedore.

Step 3: Time your drinking appropriately.

A key component to your free drink strategy — making sure you have the right amount of alcohol in your drink can mean the difference between getting hooked up and getting overlooked when the next rounds are ordered. When first starting out, I suggest just pounding most of your drink right away to avoid missing any free drink opportunities, but as you hone your skill, you’ll find yourself being able to sense when rounds are going to be ordered. This allows you to drink almost continuously throughout the night, and eliminates the all too common empty-glass situation. The goal is to have just a single swig worth of booze left in your glass when the cardholder is looking around and counting people for drinks.

Burnsy knows, someone with a Monster card is good to stand near. It also helps that Jordan Brown is a cool dude.

Step 4: Stand near the money.

Another obvious, yet important tip. Standing near the cardholder obviously helps them notice you and your near empty drink. Simple logic. Drink up.

Having gotten a drink for free makes it less annoying when Alex Mertz decides to take your beer and put it upside down in your pocket. Always keeping it classy.

Step 5: Go for the double.

This is more of an insurance policy to help guarantee you blackout. When ordering a drink, always go for a double. You never know when the drink buyer is going to get the spins, leave to hook up with someone, come down with diarrhea, or catch onto your plan, so it’s always best to plan in advance and get the most out of every drink. I typically suggest using this approach even when buying your own drinks. In case you hadn’t noticed, singles are typically reserved for pussies and underage teens. Grow a sack.

After enough free drinks, even this may seem like a good idea. Jess Kimura and Gary Milton.

I like to think of this strategy as my way stimulating the economy, even if it is with someone else’s funds. You can also think of it as doing a favor for the bartender, or saving water. You’ve bought plenty of snowboard gear in the past, it’s about time the industry gave something back to you, right? There’s plenty of ways to justify mooching free drinks to yourself, but if you stick to the plan and follow these five simple rules, I’m guessing you wont have much trouble forgetting about how socially immoral doing this is. Especially after you’re a few deep.

Oh and thanks to Snowboy Productions, CAPiTA and Think Thank for the premiere! It definitely did not suck. Check out tons more pictures of cool dudes and drunken debauchery on our Facebook.

12 replies
  1. jerm
    jerm says:

    left out my favorite move, wait for someone to turn their back on their drink and snag it. its best if you can do this as they turn away from the bar to collect money that way you get a full drink and not a half drank back washed thing.

  2. swag
    swag says:

    the guy in that picture, that you guys said you should know is Scott (Sweaty) Downing the NW rep for C3 and 32

  3. dakota
    dakota says:

    ya i jus got kicked outta a classy ass bar around dartmouth college for swoopin a drink. dont leave those fullies unattended at the bar haha. that was followed up by gettin kicked outta 2 frats almost in fights both times killin it.

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