Louie Froto Can Bust a Move

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Louie lookin’ tough for the ABC cameras.

“Known for his double cork front ten” was Louie’s introduction to the masses watching last night’s Dancing with the Stars. I didn’t even know he had a double cork super spin, but apparently ABC is on top of their game. This game/reality crapshoot of a show is built around getting fading celebrities and D list stars to prance around while being judged and heckled by a couple of weirdos who apparently know what dancing is supposed to look like.

Louie’s partner, Chelsie Hightower, is ironically a short little fox. The other dance partners, who are all ridiculously tall, would have had kneel to dance with Ohio’s favorite son. Regardless of all that, Hightower isn’t bad looking and hopefully Louie can swoon her into that double cork 1080 backstage.

While watching this swill I noticed something, Louie likes standing backflips and sleeveless silk shirts. I don’t know if silk or missing sleeves helps with dancing, but it doesn’t help make you look tough. I’m also guessing Vito’s board sponsor wont’ be too happy that their graphic and logo was blurred out of the pipe shots ABC put into his intro. But I suppose that too was something to laugh at. Basically ABC let snowboarding know that the real world doesn’t a shit what board you have or what company you ride for and I think we need to be reminded of that from time to time. But on to the dancing.

Vito introduced himself in style, “I hope I can go out there and bring some of my grace from the mountain to the dance floor.” Then Vito and Hightower started to boogie. Vito was in his Dad’s grey suit and Hightower worked his funky ass all over the floor. There was a sweet little spin move though, so maybe some of that mountain grace did make its way to the ABC studio. Throughout the dance Vito had this huge smile, maybe he was nervous, maybe terrified, or maybe stoked that chicks will want him for at least two years because of this.

After the dance number the judges got to work. Louie scored a 19 out of 30, which is either great, ok, or bad, I wouldn’t know because I changed the channel. Either way the judges had some damn fine jokes ready for Louie. The first judge literally said it was, “…like watching a little dancing hobbit.” which was followed up by the announcer giving Vito his new nickname, Louie Froto. As if that wasn’t enough, they even told Froto to get a haircut, but to report fairly, they all agreed Louie had the talent to possibly take his dancing to the next level.

To find out if Louie can transform from a “dancing hobbit” to a mini Travolta, tune into ABC Wedesday at eight o’clock for the results show.

Read Louie what Louie told us about being on the show here.

If you missed it, go here to watch the full episode.

8 replies
  1. admin
    admin says:

    Geez Todd. You shouldn’t have blow all your money on those YoBeat ads, you could have paid for ABC logo placement.

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