What I Do Every Day
by Rachel Cotton
Maybe people are interested in this. I really don't know.
Mon-fri. On these days, nothing ever happens between the hours of 7 am and 6 pm EST.
Every morning, I wake up early and listen to NPR as I lie in bed for 40 minutes. Eventually, I get up and put on my wrinkled "work clothes," which are never appropriate for the weather. I go downstairs, eat a luna bar and drink some water and then brush my teeth and maybe my hair.
This is not me and this is not what I wear to work. |
Next, while listening to opera, I ride my bike to the bus stop, making sure to cut off all the cars I encounter in my journey. I get on the bus and then the train and read a lot of pages in the process. Once I arrive at work, which is always 15 minutes later than the latest time I’m "allowed" to get there, I walk over to the cubicle that I share with 4 computers and one other person and sit down in my chair. After that, nothing else happens all day. In fact, the only exciting thing that ever happens to me during daylight hours is the occasional lunch escapade; sometimes during my break, I do exciting stuff like accompany my friend on his courier rounds for four hours or talk to people in the park or steal magazines and food, but usually that stuff doesn't happen and life is fairly dull. Eventually, after doing lots of nothing all day, I’m done with work so I take the elevator downstairs and go outside and breathe for the first time in a while. Then I either go home or I don't.
This is what I usually do at night. It doesn't need sentences. Feel free to mix and match:
Here are some pictures of people wearing headsets. I don't wear a headset at work, but the lady who sits in the cubicle next to mine does. She's knows spanish and she's on vacation right now |
ride my bike.
take a nap.
go to useless "strategizing" meetings.
skateboard.
watch movies.
eat dinner.
walk 6 miles.
go see bands scream.
do idiotic computer stuff.
write stories.
think I'm gonna go dumpster diving but then it ends up raining or I fall asleep.
work on a zine.
read.
talk.
listen to and fondle my precious records.
brainstorm.
top secret stuff.
In conclusion, I’m a very exciting person. For some tips on workplace rebellion, see part two.
What I Do Every Day: I’m so boring. Also, suggestions ofoffice chair rebellion.
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