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Vail Resorts Eyes Up Park Place and Boardwalk after Whistler Acquisition

gondolajail

After last week’s purchase of Whistler Blackcomb, Vail Resorts CEO, Rob Katz, announced today that Vail will be looking to add the acclaimed Park Place and Boardwalk properties to their already impressive dossier of holdings which uniquely blend the Disney World feel with the overpriced, exclusive atmosphere of a country club. It’s a move Monopoly players of all ages are calling, “brilliant.”

Boardwalk LG outlines

“Our goal is simple” said Katz. “We want to create as much homogeneity in the resort world as possible. We know our clients expect to be able to find the same $17 cheeseburger at all of our resorts, and they understand that everything comes at a premium at the Vail resorts.” “We understand our clients are not big fans of diversity (unless it’s the cheap hired help) and are more comfortable when everything is the same. It’s why Denny’s and Outback Steakhouse are so successful.” Katz continued. The move comes after a series of recent resort property acquisitions which have expanded operations beyond their holdings in Colorado to include: Park City, UT, Deer Valley, UT, Heavenly, CA, Kirkwood, CA, Northstar, CA, and several other locations in the midwest including Afton Alps, MN and Brighton, MI.

$17 cheeseburger

With a solid understanding of the rules of Monopoly, Vail resorts has attempted to acquire a majority share in any given state’s resort market. “That way we can charge you double!” Katz grinned. “We want everywhere you go to be owned by Vail!” said Katz as he drove off in a pewter sports coupe waiving his top hat and laughing.

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Related, Yobeat reviewed Snowboard Monopoly a few years back. 

Just another old crusty fuck.
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Comments (22)

  1. THE INFAMOUS O.G. WINDLIP QUARTERPIPE SESSIONS KINDA RULED.

     
  2. fuck Alta ….. old skiers . lowest form of life on earth …

     
    • Right next to Vail’s management….

       
  3. Everyone acts like vail are the greedy fuckers messing up the snowboard industry. They offer prices to mountains and those mountains sell. The management of whistler clearly didnt give a shit

     
  4. Vail tried to copyright “Park City”, as in the fucking name of town stating they only wanted to protect them.

    What the fuck are you protecting us from? More like sinking your yellowed-teeth into shitty t-shirt merchandise, etc.

    Whoever is stating they want the ‘basin to be bough by Vail is a blind cunt. You KNOW NOTHING-fear the machine, little boy.

     
  5. VAIL by SNOWBASIN / UTAH …so we can say by-by to TIM EASTLEY ,, GAYEST park manager in NORTH AMERICA ….

     

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