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All I Want for Christmas

Dear Santa,

We assume it’s always snowing at the North Pole, so you may not be aware of how not-white this Christmas is shaping up to be.

As you can see from the above video, things are getting pretty dire. We’re doing our best to be nice and make the best of what little snow we have, but seriously, it’s not just the East Coast that’s suffering this year. Even in normally snowy places such as Oregon and Utah we’re riding on grass. It’s not good. Now, we were thinking about just saying fuck it and going skateboarding, but then we realized, this girl is like 15 and way, way better than we’ll ever be:

So seriously, let’s get some white stuff around these parts. Christmas is around the corner and we know you have magical powers because you can travel the whole world in one night and fit through chimneys. Plus we figure you gotta know Mother Nature, so maybe kindly explain to her that the plains states don’t need any snow, but the west coast, and New England, really do. She’ll listen to you.

Whatever it takes, we’re asking from the bottom of our hearts, please just bring us some snow for Christmas. Otherwise, we’re all gonna come up there and shred, and while we snowboarders may look like elves, we’re actually really, really lazy. Trust us. You don’t want that.

Thanks Santa, you’re the best.


one of the founders of the internet.
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Comments (16)

  1. She skates faster than p rod anyway.

  2. i <3 john

  3. obviously, when it comes to girls doing anything, all thats important is whether you would fuck her or not. leave it to men to think with the heads in the pants. more blood flow down there.

  4. I think that chick tried to give me skittles once